When a Man Likes a Woman

5527488edef99When a man likes a woman she knows how he feels. She feels beautiful, confident and appreciates who she is. There is no anxiety. No agitation. He asks to see her again. She accepts and is excited. Things fall into place. 

When a man likes a woman it isn’t a guessing game.

She knows how he feels and she feels the same.

And if he doesn’t like her? Well then she cuts her losses, dusts herself off, continues to love who she is on the inside and outside, and keeps looking for the man who goes out of his way to impress her and follows up for a second date. He doesn’t make excuses. He genuinely wants her.

This is not personal.

This is online dating.


Online Dating Tips – Sensible Advice For Nonsensical Romance

Everyone has different non negotiable aspects when it comes to dating. What is a deal breaker for me may not be a deal breaker for you but I have compiled some notes that may help you save some time while searching for a romantic partner.

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Breaking Up With Therapy

June 2012: The Beginning

I was 22-years-old on a road trip to Boston with two of my best friends from college, and I was lost.

My friends would be returning to school for another semester while I was forced to leave our wonderful bubble. I was alone and no one could understand the range of emotions I was feeling. I wanted to run away from Long Island; continue having fun, random, adventures. Forget the future; cling to the past.

Paralyzed by fear and anxiety, I sat in the passenger seat of my friend’s car contemplating the rest of my life. Just then, my phone rang. It was a woman from the counseling center I had contacted the day before. This comforting voice was there to help me sort out my past, present and future. It was time for me to learn how to face my feelings.

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Stop Being Scared and Start Making Moves


I sometimes find myself saying things like “I just want to be a housewife with four kids,” or “I can’t wait until I’m 65, married and retired.” The adventures that happen when you’re in your 20’s feel too much to handle sometimes. My attention span can only focus on one thing at a time. It’s either me being completely distracted by boys (I love boys) or stuck in my negative thinking about my career (I’ll never get there) or me planning trips to Thailand and Europe that I know will never happen.

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It wasn’t really fear babe … it was knowing.

A while back I wrote a post titled “Fear.” It was about how I felt like my boyfriend wouldn’t love me like I felt I needed to be loved. He said all sorts of silly things that just didn’t add up in my mind as a man who was dedicated to me or our relationship. I had all these fears of him not wanting to be my teammate, work with me, be on my side. I could see the way our relationship would go right in the beginning, however by the end of my blog post I came to this conclusion:

“Some people are all alone. They don’t have anyone. They don’t share what we have. We’re two lucky people. People would do anything to have what we do.”

More than a year later, and with the ending of that relationship, I have now come to this conclusion:

Being alone is so much better than being with someone who is not a good match for you. Everyone needs someone who is going to lift them up, not push them down. When you have challenges you want to be able to work on them together and get past it, not stay stagnant. A good partner can make you laugh when you’re feeling down. They look out for you when you’re crossing the street. They care more for your feelings than they do about their own. They compromise, split the work and communicate. Maybe they don’t do all of these things forever but for the most part they get the best two out of three and everything runs smoothly with just a few bumps along the way. It’s not anything that’s gut wrenching.

I once described us as “two lucky people.” Luck isn’t exactly a word I’d use now. We were both available at the same time and it just so happened that we were attracted to each other and loved to kiss. It was fun. It was shallow. I never let him peer into my soul. I never let him read my writings. The failures of our relationship had made me so sad that beauty escaped my writing. It was all so dark and sparked by us and our issues. I could never bring myself to reveal that to him.

No one would want what we actually had because it was only infatuation. A mild obsession that lasted for only three months before I realized we weren’t a good match. I felt myself sink deeper when we were together. He would grow emotional, my heart would feel like a hunk of led trapped in my chest, and I’d stay around and support him. He gave me a sense of security. I knew he loved me the idea of who he thought I was too much to walk away.

This was a lesson that needed to be learned. I am so grateful for this experience and reflection.


A Perfect Day

The sun is in the midst of sleep; slowly making its way down the skyline; disappearing until the morning light. Racing down the mountain with the wind blowing through my hair. It seems like an eternity before I reach the bottom. Everything green and lush surrounds me. I kick off my shoes and stand at the riverside. The water is clear and cool. I can see fish swimming over my toes. The sun is slowly setting. The day has come to an end but there’s still hope for tomorrow when I can race down the mountain, let the wind blow through my hair, and feel the earth beneath my feet again.